A Consolidation with the Past

Some days, when the heavy fogs choke my view, I seek resolute in the vibrancy of the past. Of those colour-shifting moments, which defined, so conceivably, what life was like before and what life is like after. Such as those five days that took place almost twenty years ago, conversations that reached depths I had never experienced before. A little retreat of the imagination, an attempt to makes something out of the lasting friendship that almost began. There's a sacredness, in which I desperately hold onto and seek solace, that belongs to this first-of-its-kind soul connection, one that I was told was not okay to keep in the context of my life. I had put it away in the back pocket of my heart, out of sight, coated in shame, wedged between right and wrong. It was only more than a decade later, through new before-and-after defining moments, that I unlocked the door to its cage to let truth in and pain out, did the narrative begin to alter. Through the example of another love lost, and I began to see it for the depth it possess rather than through the tint of my faults. As I navigate my way back to truth, under the guidance of my soul, the lenses begin to drop. I come back to the past with a clearer view. The longing that has been seeking refuge is finding its home in acceptance, and resolve in Truth.